Saturday, February 6, 2010

WF ISO Blanket

As kids, my brother and I both had security blankets. My brother’s actually had a name, Frank Blank, which is not only stupid sounding but even more idiotic in light of the fact that this was his blanket’s nickname, shortened from the even more ludicrous Franket Blanket.

When I was four or five my blanket got "lost". In actuality this was my mother’s tough-love method to break me of what she perceived to be my blankie-addiction. Either that, or she was really, really evil—a proposition which, to this day, I am not convinced is entirely untrue. At any rate, she snatched my blanket while I slept, hid it in a closet, and let me throw myself on the floor in hysterics for a few days until I wore myself out.

I eventually had to put myself back together and trudge on—blanketless—in a cold, cruel world. I had to figure out how to soothe myself sans outside influences, something I’ve never really mastered. (You will note the difference between "soothing" oneself and "satisfying" oneself. I am quite skilled at the latter). Interestingly enough, my mom allowed my brother to keep his pal, Franket, indefinitely. Brat.

My brother grew up to be self-assured, successful and grossly confident. I, on the other hand, have spent the last 25 years in hot, messy, desperate pursuit of anything that will to make me feel secure again.

My blanket has yet to resurface.

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